Corking the Bottle

Most of what I read these days is an effort to learn more about myself, about others, and about my higher power I call God. In Sacred Rest ( https://www.faithwords.com/titles/dr-saundra-dalton-smith/sacred-rest/9781478921660/ ) Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith tells about a patient she once treated. The woman had cut her wrists. "Large brown eyes were not looking at me; they were looking into me.... 'Do you sometimes feel invisible too?' ... I had never cut my wrist, but I was the same as her. I too was medicating my loneliness. Not through cuts and self-mutilation, but through my own vices. While she resorted to a blade, my weapon of choice left little evidence of a problem. While she sought relief in watching the blood running down her arms, I sought relief in hiding behind a mask of perceived normalcy." Many who cut their wrists are seeking to end their numbness. Some do it for attention. I chose to hide loneliness and sadness by drinking them away, rather than ...

Here is a post I found on the Faces and Voices of Recovery Facebook group site. Does loneliness cause you to use or want to use? Then Paul's story is for you. Paul Noiles December 15 at 7:42 AM Addiction is one of the loneliest disorders. From the outside, I seemed to be the opposite of lonely. I was an extrovert with high social skills, lots of good- time buddies and was the life of many parties. I can even remember my wife being jealous of how easily I made friends. But in reality, I was a fake. I was a masterful actor who never came off the stage because I feared the real me was not enough. I created the fake Paul because I could not handle any more rejection or humiliation, which began in my childhood environment. I created the fake Paul to hide the shame of being a highly sensitive person (HSP). I created the fake Paul because I felt unwanted and alone. "Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty....

[First published June 7, 2018] As I understand Freud, he spent a lot of time discussing childhood, relationships with parents, and the Oedipus complex. My psychiatrist turned me onto a book he thought might be helpful. Boy, he was right! I am now reading it for a second time. It is full of good stuff to help me get to the real root of my hangups. It's about cognitive therapy, which says my relationship with my father isn't all that significant. The book is  The Feeling Good Handbook , by Dr. David D. Burns. It would be difficult to delve into many specifics because the theory is hard to explain in a few short blog posts. (Burns' book is two inches and 729 pages including the index.) Maybe a website on cognitive theory will pique your interest. O ne to try is  https://www.cognitivetherapynyc.com/What-Is-Cognitive-Therapy.aspx . That site describes cognitive theory this way: "Cognitive-behavioral therapy is a relatively short-term, focused psychotherapy for a wide r...

I hope this series of blog posts will enable you to recognize some symptoms of relapse. I meant well and tried hard, but I kept relapsing anyway. There was often a nagging little voice telling me to go ahead and try a drink. Maybe this series of blog posts will help you or a loved one break out of the relapse pattern sooner and easier than I did. Terence T. Gorski, co-author of  Staying Sober , identified 11 phases of relapse in his book Staying Sober ( https://www.amazon.com/Terence-T.-Gorski/e/B001JSA9K8 ). I hope you will find this series helpful enough to review again and again -- at once or in parts. An idea might be to checkmark symptoms in the 11 phases to see if you or a loved one is in danger of relapsing. Then take action. Gorski's research involved 118 recovering patients who had four things in common: They completed a 21- or 28-day rehab program; They recognized they could never again safely use alcohol; They intended to remain sober forever through A.A. and ou...

I hope this series of blog posts will enable you to recognize some symptoms of relapse. I meant well and tried hard, but I kept relapsing anyway. There was often a nagging little voice telling me to go ahead and try a drink. Maybe this series of blog posts will help you or a loved one break out of the relapse pattern sooner and easier than I did. Terrance T. Gorski, co-author of Staying Sober, identified 11 phases of relapse in his book Staying Sober (https://www.amazon.com/Terence-T.-Gorski/e/B001JSA9K8). I hope you will find this series helpful enough to review again and again -- at once or in parts. An idea might be to checkmark symptoms in the 11 phases to see if you or a loved one is in danger of relapsing. Then take action. Gorski's research involved 118 recovering patients who had four things in common: They completed a 21- or 28-day rehab program; They recognized they could never again safely use alcohol; They intended to remain sober forever through A.A. and outpat...

As I understand Freud, he spent a lot of time discussing childhood, relationships with parents, and the Oedipus complex. My psychiatrist turned me onto a book he thought might be helpful. Boy, he was right! I am now reading it for a second time. It is full of good stuff to help me get to the real root of my hangups. It's about cognitive therapy, which says my relationship with my father isn't all that significant. The book is The Feeling Good Handbook , by Dr. David D. Burns. It would be difficult to delve into many specifics because the theory is hard to explain in a few short blog posts. (Burns' book is two inches and 729 pages including the index.) Maybe a website on cognitive theory will pique your interest. O ne to try is https://www.cognitivetherapynyc.com/What-Is-Cognitive-Therapy.aspx . That site describes cognitive theory this way: "Cognitive-behavioral therapy is a relatively short-term, focused psychotherapy for a wide range of psychological problems inc...