Corking the Bottle

“The mentality and behavior of drug addicts and alcoholics is wholly irrational until you understand that they are completely powerless over their addiction and unless they have structured help, they have no hope.” ―  Russell Brand "Structured help" may take many forms that can be different for different people. In my case, the help has been A.A., 12 Steps, my sponsor, group therapy, a psychiatrist, a therapist, God, exercise, and my caring wife.

I often tell people my ongoing recovery from alcoholism isn't attributed to one flash of light. Instead I have a toolbox. A plethora of tools has led me here. There was A.A., group therapy, a psychiatrist, medication, a therapist, my wife, books including The Big Book, inpatient treatment, and more. It hasn't been one tool Following through with the metaphor of the toolbox, I heard a line at last night's A.A. meeting: "A.A. has a wrench to fit every nut."

(First published June 14, 2018 and edited today) I'm not very handy when it comes to fixing stuff. At one time, my excuse was no good tools. Now I have plenty of tools and no legitimate excuses. Repairs may take me a long time, but I can only blame lack of knowledge or lack of effort when I fail. I've got plenty of tools in ye olde toolbox. Same thing when it comes to drinking. I'm not so handy when it comes to fixing myself. But when I mess up, I don't degrade myself. I add another tool and sometimes get rid of the ones that aren't helping me. I started off going to A.A. meetings once in a while and going to a local government-supported therapy program. I soon found I needed more than those two tools alone. My toolbox is now full. I regularly: Have a sponsor. See a psychiatrist. See a therapist who exchanges notes with the psychiatrist. Take antidepressants and 500 mg of Antabuse, which is supposed to make me sick if I put alcohol into my system. Sti...

Let's consider today the paradox of giving up alcohol. No one could make me quit. I had to have the desire to do it and then accept the guidance of A.A. and therapists. Yesterday's Daily Reflection called sobriety "an individual adventure, something which each one of us works out in his own way." True, but I can't do it myself. I need a sponsor. I need the support of other recovering alcoholics. I need the care and concern of my family. In my case, I need medication, professional therapists, psychiatrists, and a month of in-patient rehab. See the paradox? Recovery is an individual thing that we can't do alone.