Corking the Bottle

I have chronic leg pain. Old age? The 29 marathons and one 50-miler I ran in my days as a running addict? I'm sore these days if I stand or walk for a while. That's Pain with a capital P. Today I want to write about a different kind of pain. A regular at my noon A.A. meeting yesterday vaguely described some psychological pain she is going through, and it's becoming harder and harder to avoid relief in a bottle. I spoke up that the A.A. promises we read at every meeting are real, but they don't promise that a sober life is a painless life: 1. If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. 2. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. 3. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. 4. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. 5. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. 6. That feeling of uselessne...

I asked what drives your life. Rick Warren in  The Purpose-Driven Life  ( https://www.churchsource.com/rickwarren ) suggests four drivers that often distract us from what really  should  be driving our lives. Yesterday it was fear. Today: Materialism -- Some are led by a desire to acquire. So what? If I have many possessions won't that make me happy, feel important and more secure? Nope. "Possessions only provide temporary happiness. Because these things do not change, we eventually become bored with them and then want newer, bigger, better versions." Second, possessions don't make us more important. "Self-worth and net-worth are not the same." And third -- more secure? Material things can be lost by theft, flood, fire, or sometimes divorce. (You know if I'm talking to you .) "Real security can only be found in that which can never be taken from you -- your relationship with God." God is the way to sobriety!

I asked what drives your life. Rick Warren in The Purpose-Driven Life  ( https://www.churchsource.com/rickwarren ) suggests five drivers that often distract us from what really  should be driving our lives. Yesterday it was anger and resentment. Today: Fear -- "Fears may be a result of a traumatic experience, unrealistic expectations, growing up in a high-control home, or even genetic predisposition." In my case as an adolescent, the fear that drove me was a fear of rejection. That's what kept me from asking girls to go out with me. I was afraid my life would be ruined if a girl told me "No." So I stood back and watched my friends be brave. While they were in the game, I was on the sidelines feeling alone. Whatever fear may drive you, it causes you to miss out on opportunities. You decide not to take risks and hope everything will turn out all right. "Fear is a self-imposed prison that will keep you from becoming what God intends for you to be."

I asked yesterday what drives your life. Rick Warren in The Purpose-Driven Life ( https://www.churchsource.com/rickwarren ) suggests  four drivers that often distract us from what really should be driving our lives: The past  has passed. Resentment and Anger -- Some of us would rather get even than get healthy. We bottle up our hurts and never get over them. Instead, we react poorly. "Some resentment-driven people " clam up " and internalize their anger, while others " blow up " and explode it onto others. Both responses are unhealthy and unhelpful." The past is gone. The person we think wronged us probably has forgotten about whatever it is that keeps you resentful. No one who hurt you in the past can continue to hurt you unless you allow it, "For your own sake, learn from it and then let it go."

Take a minute. What guides your life? The correct answer here is God. But all of us -- some of the time, all of the time, or part of the time -- are driven by painful, bad stuff. If you are reading this, maybe you are being driven by alcohol or other drugs. The Self-Driven Life gives us four common things that take the wheel as we drop God off at at a bus stop in Kalamazoo. This is a wonderful book, written by Rick Warren ( https://www.churchsource.com/rickwarren ), that gives me lots of oh-yea moments. Here are his top drivers. For the next five blog posts, I will write a little about each. They are: Many people are driven by guilt. Many people are driven by resentment and anger. Many people are driven by fear. Many people are driven by materialism. Many people are driven by the need for approval. I will dissect each like a frog in a high school biology class.