Remember, But Don't Go Dwelling in the Past

I've written  umpteen times that the issue that led me to drink was looking to my past and comparing it with my present. That was depressing, and seemed to be fixable only with another drink. Then another.

One of my favorite Beatles songs, probably not surprising, is one that goes like this:

There are places I remember all my life
Though some have changed
Some forever not for better
Some have gone and some remain

I went through an onslaught of change that caught up with me around 2006. From there it was a slow descent into depression. If I drank a little, my mood would swing to a better place. But eventually, I couldn't drink just a little.

And I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before
I know I'll often stop and think about them...

The Ninth Step Promises in the Big Book, which we read before every meeting, describes the way we should remember our past: "We will not forget the past nor wish to shut the door on it."

Now I live in the present, not the past. Yet I will not forget the past. My mind can still go there, but that isn't a place I want to stay.