What Makes You So Tired?

Here is food for thought if you're still working and not retired, like me. Funny word: retired. I don't work, so I find I have lots of energy in spite of my age. But if you still work, you probably find yourself tired, without the re-, at least some of the time.

I found this in some stuff I've saved from various workshops and therapy. I don't remember where it came from. I don't remember a lot of things from my dark days. It is credited to that greatest of all writers, Anonymous.

"Yes, I'm tired. For several years I've been blaming it on middle age, iron-poor blood, lack of vitamins, air pollution, water pollution, saccharin, obesity, dieting, under-arm odor, yellow wax building up, and a dozen other maladies that make you wonder if life is worth living.

"But now I find out, it isn't that. I'm tired because I'm overworked.

"The population of this country is 200 million. Eighty-four million are retired. That leaves 116 million to do the work. There are 75 million in school, which leaves 41 million to do the work. Of this total, there are 22 million employed by the government.

"That leaves 19 million to do the work.

"Four million are in the armed forces, which leaves 15 million to do the work. Take from that total 14,800,000 people who work for the state and city governments and that leaves 200,000 to do the work. There are 188,000 in hospitals, so that leaves 12,000 to do the work.

"Now there are 11,998 people in prisons. That leaves just two people to do the work. You and me. And you're sitting there reading this. No wonder I'm tired."

And if I'm drunk, where does that leave you?