I'm No Longer Chair-man and I Couch My Sarcasm
I'm on a break so I'll make this fast. My wife drafted me to move furniture in the family room; not just move it, but tear it apart. Do you suppose I have any say?
We have had a big curved couch for many years that took up space and made furniture rearranging -- call it "female nesting" -- more difficult. With little measuring and front-end planning, we lifted, tugged, pulled, and pushed to separate the couch into three sections. She just excused me while she empties the antique desk drawers so the large upright piece can be moved from that side of the room to this side. Then the middle section of the couch can fit where the desk was and the large recliner in the corner will be moved to my basement man cave -- if we can fit it down the narrow stairway. Note sarcasm and surrender.
You don't care, and the details are unimportant to you. My point in all this is to: 1) vent, 2) talk about control, and 3) talk about change.
Number 1 was taken care of by writing the second paragraph. Number 2, control, it became clear, is still something I need to work on. My suggestions all were ignored, including my discovery of how to take the couch apart. I felt emasculated. I had to reign in my wild horses and accept that, in the end, I didn't much care where the furniture went. My wife is a control freak, even worse than I am. So I let her have her day of female nesting.
She accused me of hating change. I answered that I am fine with change as long as it is for the better. The jury is still out on this change. (Good thing, because there's little place to sit.)
The lesson is that I have made good strides when it comes to control. "Lack of power, that was our dilemma" (Big Book, page 45). I found power in God, and I am learning to relinquish my hunger for control in all situations.
Watching my life change and spin recklessly out of control was another problem that led me to drink away my pain. I have come to accept that life is all about change, and not all of it is good. I am a retired empty-nester, but for a time I resisted this new chapter in my life. I now recognize that I turned the pages to start a new chapter many times in my life. This new chapter came with a loss of -- all together, everyone -- control.
To summarize, my alcoholism stemmed from a loss of control and change I found unacceptable. That's behind me now. Life is good again -- different, but good. It's a life in which God plays a major role.
I'm going back to the family room now. I will do so with a smile on my face and my mouth securely shut.
We have had a big curved couch for many years that took up space and made furniture rearranging -- call it "female nesting" -- more difficult. With little measuring and front-end planning, we lifted, tugged, pulled, and pushed to separate the couch into three sections. She just excused me while she empties the antique desk drawers so the large upright piece can be moved from that side of the room to this side. Then the middle section of the couch can fit where the desk was and the large recliner in the corner will be moved to my basement man cave -- if we can fit it down the narrow stairway. Note sarcasm and surrender.You don't care, and the details are unimportant to you. My point in all this is to: 1) vent, 2) talk about control, and 3) talk about change.
Number 1 was taken care of by writing the second paragraph. Number 2, control, it became clear, is still something I need to work on. My suggestions all were ignored, including my discovery of how to take the couch apart. I felt emasculated. I had to reign in my wild horses and accept that, in the end, I didn't much care where the furniture went. My wife is a control freak, even worse than I am. So I let her have her day of female nesting.
She accused me of hating change. I answered that I am fine with change as long as it is for the better. The jury is still out on this change. (Good thing, because there's little place to sit.)
The lesson is that I have made good strides when it comes to control. "Lack of power, that was our dilemma" (Big Book, page 45). I found power in God, and I am learning to relinquish my hunger for control in all situations.
Watching my life change and spin recklessly out of control was another problem that led me to drink away my pain. I have come to accept that life is all about change, and not all of it is good. I am a retired empty-nester, but for a time I resisted this new chapter in my life. I now recognize that I turned the pages to start a new chapter many times in my life. This new chapter came with a loss of -- all together, everyone -- control.
To summarize, my alcoholism stemmed from a loss of control and change I found unacceptable. That's behind me now. Life is good again -- different, but good. It's a life in which God plays a major role.
I'm going back to the family room now. I will do so with a smile on my face and my mouth securely shut.
Comments
Post a Comment