I'll Get You, My Pretty! And Your Little Dog, Too!
(First published June 22, 2018)
It must have been the first time I watched The Wizard of Oz. I was in first grade or younger; my sister was a year and a half younger than I. When the witch came on the screen -- although all we had was a black-and-white TV -- she was still scary enough that I can remember how that fear felt. My sister hid behind the couch and cried.
I still feel fear, but it's a different kind. That movie was fight-or-flight fear. I felt threatened by danger, even though the danger was irrational. My fears these days remain irrational fears, like, will I make someone mad? Will people not like me? Will my kids give up on their alcoholic father?
According to Dr. David D. Burns in The Feeling Good Handbook (https://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Handbook-David-Burns-1999-10-28/dp/B017MYK3SU/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1529692806&sr=8-4&keywords=feeling+good+handbook), fear must be dealt with head-on. "When you avoid frightening situations, you simply make your problem worse.... Facing your fears will help you conquer them. You learn the catastrophe you fear will not really happen."
Doing so is uncomfortable at first. Like speaking your mind at an A.A. meeting. No one gets mad, and people get to know me and actually like me. As faced fears diminish, we often find fear is replaced by exhilaration and pride.
Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain. Pull the curtain all the way back and expose him for what he really is. And be assured that drinking never conquered fear permanently. "We have nothing to fear but fear itself."
Except for the wicked witch of the west!
It must have been the first time I watched The Wizard of Oz. I was in first grade or younger; my sister was a year and a half younger than I. When the witch came on the screen -- although all we had was a black-and-white TV -- she was still scary enough that I can remember how that fear felt. My sister hid behind the couch and cried.I still feel fear, but it's a different kind. That movie was fight-or-flight fear. I felt threatened by danger, even though the danger was irrational. My fears these days remain irrational fears, like, will I make someone mad? Will people not like me? Will my kids give up on their alcoholic father?
According to Dr. David D. Burns in The Feeling Good Handbook (https://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Handbook-David-Burns-1999-10-28/dp/B017MYK3SU/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1529692806&sr=8-4&keywords=feeling+good+handbook), fear must be dealt with head-on. "When you avoid frightening situations, you simply make your problem worse.... Facing your fears will help you conquer them. You learn the catastrophe you fear will not really happen."
Doing so is uncomfortable at first. Like speaking your mind at an A.A. meeting. No one gets mad, and people get to know me and actually like me. As faced fears diminish, we often find fear is replaced by exhilaration and pride.
Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain. Pull the curtain all the way back and expose him for what he really is. And be assured that drinking never conquered fear permanently. "We have nothing to fear but fear itself."
Except for the wicked witch of the west!
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