How To Make Amends to Long-Gone School Chums
Step 9: "Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others."
I struggled with this until my sponsor advised me to make my amends when doing so made sense, not necessarily on some preconceived occasion where bringing up past hurts would be awkward for all.
So I made amends in my blog post here Thursday to any schoolmates I may have verbally bullied. I wrote on a high school group Facebook page: "I hope my blog post today (December 6) will begin to make amends to those in high school I put down or ignored. I am so sorry I wasn't nicer to all. You can see my apology at corkingthebottle.blogspot.com."
I was nervous about opening this can of worms. But I needn't have worried. Here are comments I received:
Tremendous courage Dan. A great model to emulate. Risks bring joyful rewards! We all have a past. You express great maturity and maturity by others will be seen in their grace and understanding.
I graduated in 1965 so I don't know you, but it takes great courage to write what you did. We all have flaws and we all try to overcome them. The belief in the Lord and we are all created equal is a start, by listening to his word and living the life he wants us to live will help us tremendously. Good luck Dan.
Dan...read your blog. I am sure we all were unkind to our classmates at one time or another. Part of being young and misinformed. I honestly don’t remember how many classes we had together in junior and senior high so I know we were not close friends at that time. What I love now is the reconnection and the opportunity to get to know you better and form a more meaningful friendship. I truly admire your honesty and wish nothing but the best for you!
I am older than you BFHS class of 1957. I remember that moment, my senior year, when I got to know one of the "bad boys" in our class. We shared the same home room, and by that close contact every day, learned that he was a very nice person, in spite of his appearance. We were never close, but he made me look at everyone I met a little bit closer. I don't look down my nose at any member of the community. (I have actually met and told the garbage man that, in my opinion, he is one of the most important folksy in town. If not for him and his co-workers, we would be buried in trash.) Thank you for your courage. In sorry it took so many negative experiences to learn this.
Dan, I just read your blog, and I never thought you were arrogant in high school. I remember you as extremely humorous, but only you know the true feelings of your heart. This was a very humbling thing for you to do. I applaud you and wish you well! Merry Christmas, Dan!
You’re a good guy Dan!
I don't know you at all, but admire your determination to make amends. Keep on keeping on!
Dan my friend! You definitely owe me an apology because I did not get all A's & B's (maybe a few). But you were always into sports and that was pretty cool. Being serious though, I respect what you are doing with your life and the help you will certainly pass on to others !!!
In addition, I received 21 likes. All positives, no negatives. I'm told not all amends are well-received. But sobriety dictates that we gotta make them. I feel good about my Beaver Falls Facebook friends. I suggest you seek ways to make amends to those you have harmed. It will do you good, even if you have never been addicted to alcohol or other drugs.
I struggled with this until my sponsor advised me to make my amends when doing so made sense, not necessarily on some preconceived occasion where bringing up past hurts would be awkward for all.
So I made amends in my blog post here Thursday to any schoolmates I may have verbally bullied. I wrote on a high school group Facebook page: "I hope my blog post today (December 6) will begin to make amends to those in high school I put down or ignored. I am so sorry I wasn't nicer to all. You can see my apology at corkingthebottle.blogspot.com."
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| Beaver Falls, PA |
I was nervous about opening this can of worms. But I needn't have worried. Here are comments I received:
Tremendous courage Dan. A great model to emulate. Risks bring joyful rewards! We all have a past. You express great maturity and maturity by others will be seen in their grace and understanding.
I graduated in 1965 so I don't know you, but it takes great courage to write what you did. We all have flaws and we all try to overcome them. The belief in the Lord and we are all created equal is a start, by listening to his word and living the life he wants us to live will help us tremendously. Good luck Dan.
Dan...read your blog. I am sure we all were unkind to our classmates at one time or another. Part of being young and misinformed. I honestly don’t remember how many classes we had together in junior and senior high so I know we were not close friends at that time. What I love now is the reconnection and the opportunity to get to know you better and form a more meaningful friendship. I truly admire your honesty and wish nothing but the best for you!
I am older than you BFHS class of 1957. I remember that moment, my senior year, when I got to know one of the "bad boys" in our class. We shared the same home room, and by that close contact every day, learned that he was a very nice person, in spite of his appearance. We were never close, but he made me look at everyone I met a little bit closer. I don't look down my nose at any member of the community. (I have actually met and told the garbage man that, in my opinion, he is one of the most important folksy in town. If not for him and his co-workers, we would be buried in trash.) Thank you for your courage. In sorry it took so many negative experiences to learn this.
Dan, I just read your blog, and I never thought you were arrogant in high school. I remember you as extremely humorous, but only you know the true feelings of your heart. This was a very humbling thing for you to do. I applaud you and wish you well! Merry Christmas, Dan!
You’re a good guy Dan!
I don't know you at all, but admire your determination to make amends. Keep on keeping on!
Dan my friend! You definitely owe me an apology because I did not get all A's & B's (maybe a few). But you were always into sports and that was pretty cool. Being serious though, I respect what you are doing with your life and the help you will certainly pass on to others !!!
♥️💙♥️
ManageIn addition, I received 21 likes. All positives, no negatives. I'm told not all amends are well-received. But sobriety dictates that we gotta make them. I feel good about my Beaver Falls Facebook friends. I suggest you seek ways to make amends to those you have harmed. It will do you good, even if you have never been addicted to alcohol or other drugs.
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