How To Pay Kind Attention To the Here and Now

Mindfulness is a tool I keep practicing to keep myself sober. I began drinking too much because memories of my wonderful past life had changed. Those good times were gone forever, forcing me to lay out a revised road map for my future life. Sadly, I felt better when I drank. Then I came to learn that mindfulness is something I need.

Mindfulness, in part, is paying attention to the present and finding contentment there. A Harvard study found the average person's mind is wandering 47% of the time. That means almost half of our lives is missing.

Transformation to being mindful can't be achieved by sheer willpower. It requires focus, meditation, and practice. Practice, practice, practice. What you practice grows stronger.

Mindfulness strengthens our immune system, decreases stress, and helps us sleep better. When I drank, I was fighting all the positive things that should have been happening in my mind and body. I came to feel ashamed of myself. I thought, no big deal. I'll just have two more belts and feel better.

You and I both know that shame doesn't work. I had the misguided belief I could shame myself into abstinence and improvement. Shame may be universal, but we know it doesn't work.  It causes chemicals in our brains to shut down neural pathways and prevents us from learning. We hide parts of ourselves that need attention, the character defects we need to address in A.A.'s Steps 4 through 7.

(This has nothing to do with mindfulness but if you like hockey and want a chuckle, a scene from one of my favorite films, Slapshot, tells of shame.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hf0L0yZixuA)

Mindfulness isn't just about attention to ourselves, but kind attention to others. Kindness floods our bains with dopamine and gives us courage to look at parts of ourselves we don't want to see.

I signed up for a four-part course on mindfulness beginning next month, to learn "Paying attention here and now with  kindness." I'm sure I will blog about what I learn there.

Meanwhile, if you want an introduction to mindfulness, check out the video where information for this post came: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IeblJdB2-Vo.